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Meditating on this issue over a bacon-laced california Cobb salad, I realized that there’s california a number of strong indications that our Pastafarian bretheren may, indeed, be our brothers and sisters in the LARD. The Pastafarian liturgy ends its prayers with a solemn “Ramen”. As we all know, ramen is generally served in a pork-based broth and usually features multiple slices of roast pork atop the noodles. At the very least, we know that the Pastafarians are not abstainers, or worse, vegetarians. Furthermore, california I realized that little is known about the trinitarian nature of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. We know that he is part pasta (the noodly appendages), but we know little about the meatballs and almost nothing about the sauce (including whether or not the sauce actually manifests, much like the Holy Spirit.) I offer the following interpretation, which would allow us to find common ground between Pastafarians and Bacontarians, which I call “The Carbonara Compromise”: We believe in the LARD, holy and eternal.
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